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In February 2012 I started a shit diary. Every time I took a dump, I wrote down a description of the experience, the texture, the color, the smell of my shit. I picked Twitter as media of choice, because its format seemed very appropriate at the time. For about a year I collected my impressions as dutifully as possible, and now I'm presenting this "annual report": a collection of all the entries in my diary from 2012.
I plan to keep on writing this diary for all my life, and publish the results on paper at the end of each year.
The first physical installment of Bowel Documents is a black and white, 24 pages, A5 format sine with text, pictures and illustration. It's limited to 93 handnumbered and signed copies, each coming with an original ink drawing of an asshole. On request this can be a self-portrait, a portrait of the customer, or the asshole of some celebrity the customer fancies. The sky is the limit.
I'm taking pre-orders on this to fund the printing. Prices will be slightly increased when the zine is officially released.
Price list:
45 NOK postpaid to Norway
50 NOK postpaid to Europe
60 NOK postpaid to World
paypal/info: gurkeroboter(at)))gmail(dot)))com
You can follow my Bowel Documents on Twitter and/or Facebook:
http://twitter.com/tisbor
http://www.facebook.com/pages/Bowel-Documents/363354417112482?ref=ts&fref=ts
I recommend more photos on the Facebook page.
This is what we use at work -
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bristol_stool_scale (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bristol_stool_scale)
- but I've found it not entirely accurate. Types four, five and six tend to become confused. Also, when there's an outbreak of gastro, a lot of inexperienced staff tend to think anything mushier than five is diarrhoea.
Apparently nursing staff in England have a curry parlance - describing bowel movements as a type of curry. Others could help out with telling us more.
I've smelt such faecal smells in my time that I wish I could translate into Noise. Surely the time has come for such technology?
I was expecting something like pictures of shit on shit (stuff). Like, you should take shits in wild 'n crazy spots around town and take pictures. I'd be into that. But this is still a cool idea.
Thanks for the suggestions, I will take them in consideration for the future.
The Bristol scale makes stuff (ha!) too sterile, I prefer to describe my crap as freely as possible.
Anyway this is something I will do for the rest of my life, plus I'll start diaries about other bodily functions as well.
Nice, should've gone for brown and white printing though!
Quote from: theotherjohn on February 15, 2013, 05:53:31 PM
I love the fact that whilst your wife takes a lot of pride in making and preparing food professionally, you're only really concerned about what it will look and smell like when it becomes shit... good working relationship!
Life is a circle, love is a temple.
Why did you leave out taste? Seems like that would really important for such a project.
:)
Quote from: bitewerksMTB on February 16, 2013, 01:30:39 AM
Why did you leave out taste? Seems like that would really important for such a project.
Maybe next year
Write me up on a pre-order.
In future reviews of this publication I presume I will read that Tisbor has now placed taking a shit as the fifth dish in the menu course. Props for that! Looking forward to the read.
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"BOWEL DOCUMENTS A.D. 2012" zine is finally here!
In February 2012 I started a shit diary. Every time I took a dump, I wrote down a description of the experience, the texture, the color, the smell of my shit. I picked Twitter as media of choice, because its format seemed very appropriate at the time. For about a year I collected my impressions as dutifully as possible, and now I'm presenting this "annual report": a collection of all the entries in my diary from 2012.
I plan to keep on writing this diary for all my life, and publish the results on paper at the end of each year.
The first physical installment of Bowel Documents is a black and white, 24 pages, A5 format zine with text, pictures and illustrations. It's limited to 93 handnumbered and signed copies, each coming with an original ink drawing of an asshole. On request this can be a self-portrait, a portrait of the customer, or the asshole of some celebrity the customer fancies. Sky is the limit.
50 NOK plus shipping.
contact me at gurkeroboter(att)gmail(dott)com if interested.
Thanks to everybody who placed a pre-order! They will be shipped this week.
YYYEEESSS!!! At last !
Also available from Where Frost Reign's distribution: http://wherefrostreign.tumblr.com/
And soon from Terror, Lithuania (http://www.terror.lt); Narcolepsia, Portugal (http://narcolepsiahn.wordpress.com) and Freak Animal, Finland (http://www.cfprod.com/fa/index2.php).
Thanks for the orders so far!
Last Bowel Document entry on Monday seemed like quite the archeological excavation. How did you cope with the smell?
"Extra long, solid, spicy #turds. Dark brown and fragmented. A couple of them were bent like hooks. Extremely smelly".
Ah, I'm just used to my array of smells so it's no problem
I think should baptize every turd and give him a name.
nice : ) really cheered me up after I received them..
I got 4 copies, all 4 has so good exclusive unique asshole, I actually think of keeping them all. I wonder if Tisbor would somewhere publish what all assholes he has drawn upon request. Then try to guess who's the client that ordered it...
Quote from: FreakAnimalFinland on April 24, 2013, 11:17:13 AM
I got 4 copies, all 4 has so good exclusive unique asshole, I actually think of keeping them all. I wonder if Tisbor would somewhere publish what all assholes he has drawn upon request. Then try to guess who's the client that ordered it...
Heh that would be interesting! Some requests were quite fun. Maybe I'll take time to put a list together and share it here. I'm glad you liked the assholes. Maybe you'll be surprised to hear that you were the first one requesting the most obvious among them.
For now though:
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EMPTY BOWELS SPECIAL PACKAGE OFFER!!
For a limited time, you can get both "Bowel Documents A.D. 2012" and Fecalove "Void, Chaos and Cum" CD in a bulk for a special price! You'll be able to read about my shit while listening to the fantastic music of my cock and balls.
The zine will come with a personalized drawing of the asshole of a person of your choice, while the CD comes with 3 black and white posters, a pin and a 24-pages art booklet.
Prices, including shipping:
Norge - 120 NOK
Europe - 130 NOK
World - 160 NOK
If you're interested, contact me or directly paypal some Norwegian Kronens at: gurkeroboter(at)gmail(dot)com
Quote from: tisbor on April 25, 2013, 09:58:34 PMMaybe you'll be surprised to hear that you were the first one requesting the most obvious among them.
If it's historically known fact that man had some sort of bowel issues, I guess it was mandatory request!
Publication of assholes - illustrated encyclopedia - is an interesting idea. Think it would work quite well.
re-post from the Classified section, a small list of assholes I drew for this (almost sold out) diary:
Adolf Hitler, Rupert Murdoch, Edwige Fenech, Joseph Ratzinger, Monica Bellucci, Gandhi, Susan Sontag, George Best, Aleister Crowley, Lou Reed, Nicola Vinciguerra, Whitehouse, Jerry Calà, Salo's "The President", Mr. Bo Jangles, Eva Ionesco , Mao Tse Tung, Varg Vikernes, Jennifer Connelly, Max Hardcore, Andrea Dworkin, Elizabeth Veldon, Hugo Chavez, Tom Of Finland . . . . . .
Damn I wish I was the one who requested Andrea Dworkin's asshole. Brilliant!
I'm willing to draw an Andrea Dworkin asshole on your copy if we ever cross paths
Quote from: tisbor on July 11, 2013, 10:24:21 PM
I'm willing to draw an Andrea Dworkin asshole on your copy if we ever cross paths
I'll hold you to it. I have to say though that Tom of Finland's asshole is quite nice though, and I'm happy to have such a masculine asshole on my cover.
love old thread archaeology and this one tickled, due to my work, my bowel habits and it's physicality.
if drinking heavily on empty stomach, bowels produce a smelly black slurry, as dark as the beer I drink and more insistent than a coffee shit. no zine planned for this.
I still keep this zine in my bathroom for the next lucky guest who shits without a smart phone.
mr tisbor, how about a reprint, sequel?
I think a printed archive for the last five years of activity is needed. You'll be the first to know, guys.
Quote from: tisbor on June 07, 2017, 01:51:00 AM
I think a printed archive for the last five years of activity is needed. You'll be the first to know, guys.
this is the shit!